Don't Ask, Don't Tell

How much do you share as an author? How much should you share?

Personally, I mine my experiences for some of my poetry. I assume personnas for others. I steal subject matter from family, friends, from newspaper articles, NPR broadcasts like Fresh Air. You name it, I've probably appropriated it in some way, shape or form.

The problem is that can step on toes. I have people in my life who are uncomfortable, if not downright disapproving, of the subject matter of my poetry. Especially knowing I share them in venues such as the local open mic events in the various towns I have lived in, online with RLB's poetic asides blog or online journals & in print.

This is why I have a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy about my writing. I'm not sure it's the healthiest way to deal with this dichotomy, but it's my way.

In May of 2011, I attended the Poetry Society of Virginia's Annual Poetry Festival. One of the events at the festival really spoke to and about this issue. Remica L. Bingham-Risher's The History of Us All: Peronally Politcal Poems forced us all to intertwine our personal narrative poem with a historical account/event. She and I bonded a bit over our propencity to write about personal and family events and throw them out to the world. Her family has started editing themselves around her for fear of ending up in a poem. At least, that's how she told it. Mine hasn't learned this yet.

One of my in-laws was very upset about the subject matter of the chapbook I wrote poems toward in November of 2010. A tragic event and its aftermath of a family we knew, plus other family events, commingled in my brain. I brooded over them for almost 10 years. Eventually, these poems started wanting out of my head. I couldn't not write them. These two events became a jumping off point into a chapbook about a quadriplegic girl dealing with the sudden changes in her life.

You can't play it safe when you feel like you have to write about something which won't leave you alone.

Does your writing get you in trouble with the people in your life?